I recently reached out to someone to extend kindness because I had not seen them for quite some time, and I thought I would send them a friend request on Facebook. The response I received was hateful and rude. The individual proceeded to tell me that it was because of the way I had ignored them at the local grocery store, and Walmart, that they were bitter toward me. Worse of all, this individual is a professing Christian who then sent me scriptures about love to reprove me.
Problem? This is not reality. What do I mean? If she was at the local store or Walmart, I never saw her and have absolutely no idea what she is talking about. So what’s the point? False assumptions, and ESPECIALLY false expectations, cause much division, bitterness, and harm in our relationships and churches. If she ever saw me, I did not see her. If she thought I saw her, and expected me to come to say hello, this was a false expectation.
Until we see the exceeding sinfulness of false expectations, we will never stop doing it. Be very careful that you are not severing relationships, and hindering God’s work, because you expected someone to “do this” or “that” and were disappointed. It is very foolish, and harmful, and we hurt people senselessly by doing it.
One last thing; the busier a friend may be, the more we need to understand this. When we are expecting someone to do/not do something, and they are extremely busy, it is even more unfair to them as compared to a regular situation. Walk in love and you won’t operate this way…and you can only operate in love by knowing Him who IS love. Be kind, assuming the best, and work to empathize with others. All of this is possible through God’s love.
1 John 4:8 (NKJV)
8 He who does not love does not know God, for God is love.
Philippians 4:13 (NKJV)
13 I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Titus 1:15 (NKJV)
15 To the pure all things are pure, but to those who are defiled and unbelieving nothing is pure;
but even their mind and conscience are defiled.
1 Corinthians 13:4–5 (NKJV)
4 Love…..thinks no evil